this will not be a make-up-related post, but you know how I like to make a bond between you and me from time to time.
I am so behind with my reviews, I am sorry about that. The reason why I am so behind and quite possibly have been a bit boring as of late, is that my life is a huge busy mess at the moment.
I don't know if my international followers are aware of what is going on in Italy, but in case you don't, just know it's nothing good.
The economic recession is hitting us like a hammer, and our current government does not make it easy for us to survive.
Particularly in my field, the most recently issued laws are degrading and oppressive.
I have been working as an English teacher for more than two months now and I haven't seen a penny of what I have worked so far. This is because I work with a particular kind of contract that our smart and accomodating (for the employer) government deviced years ago. It's called a co.co.co., and it means I am some sort of collaborator and that I will only see my salary once my teaching hours finish. Which means not before February. However, because we are in times of recession, payments are all very slow and there is a chance I will not be paid before late spring.
To top it all, I am working in two different cities which means I am spending all my savings and energy in commuting. It's a 2 hrs train ride, so you know it is nothing funny.
What's more, I have finally been accepted for a PhD. I can now hear you saying "Wow, girl, you're going to be a researcher! This is your first step into a bright academic future!". Little do you know.
Technically I am a researcher, but because I passed the selection fairly, based on what I know and on the value of the research I am going to make, I didn't get a scholarship.
I know this sounds completely out of any logic, but this is what happens in Italy. If you know people, then you'll have money and all you want. If you are educated, driven, talented, and determinated...you can work for free so that the others can take advantage of your work.
So, yes, this is my life now: trying to survive in this stark raving world, trying to find a solution, trying to find a way to get a scholarship to do my doctoral research abroad. Somewhere where intelligence, culture, education, and most importantly HUMAN DIGNITY is valued. Somewhere where all those things are a parameter to measure how much you are worth, and what you truly deserve.
I wish I could be proud of being Italian. I really wish. I wish my decision to literally run away (rather fly, since I live on an island) was a deliberate choice, not a dictat that has been imposed to me by a bunch of greedy politicians that are driving the country to decay.
The truth is, though, that this situation is depressing. It should not happen. It is totally unfair. My parents have nothing more than a high school degree. They wanted my future to look brighter than theirs. I was raised to believe that knowledge is power. As I am growing older, knowledge seems to me like famine and exploitation, instead. Since the age of 15, I have been working and studying to afford paying my higher education.
Now I wake up in the morning and tell my own self "remind me, once again, why did I do this?"
And since misery loves company, my grandfather has been in the hospital for almost a month now, and he's been feeling really poorly.
In conclusion, this is why I haven't been posting many FOTD's lately (which I truly love doing): because I just haven't been in the mood to smile.
On the bright side, I still have something that keeps me alive: the love of my boyfriend. The most special person I could ever meet. Someone who can put a smile on my face. Someone who knows what true love is, and how to show it. Someone I know will stand by me even in the worst times.
We now live in two different cities, so I do miss him loads.
Just do not unsubscribe, please. I hope you enjoy reading the reviews I'm posting, and that you find them useful, at least.
I will be back with FOTD's soon. I promise. I just need to find the will to smile again. Bear with me. Or tell me a joke to make me smile :)
Have a good night, lovely ladies.